Depression is more than just sadness and lots of crying. It’s a constant numb feeling that never really goes away, even when someone engages in activities that they used to enjoy. Here are the signs.
1. Talent and Expressive
Don’t misunderstand this to mean that sadness and depression can make you a more skilled person. However, there is a correlation between those who are expressive in their everyday lives and higher risks of depression.
No one knows for sure, but it could be because they’re so attuned with their moods and feelings that they tend to be more receptive towards negative emotions as well. Other people think that expressive people tend to judge themselves more harshly than people who work in less-expressive occupations. It’s tough to say.
2. High Defense Mechanisms
People who are more prone to depression tend to have higher walls around themselves, emotionally. This is because they don’t want other people to know that something is wrong, so they act fine to keep people at a distance.
They start to learn that they’re very good at hiding their emotions and will use that as a defense mechanism so that no one asks any questions. In fact, they may seem extraordinarily upbeat, bouncy, and very lively. This habit is dangerous for everyone since no one will see the smaller signs that they need help and won’t know anything’s wrong until it’s too late.
3. Issues with Abandonment
People experiencing depression have a hard enough time trying to let people into their lives. That’s because they don’t want someone else to see them at their worst. However, on the small chances that they do let someone in, it can be a lot for that person to take in and they choose to walk away.
That can be difficult for a depressed person to take, as they soon start to believe that everyone’s going to leave them eventually. It also creates the false belief that their depression will only drive other people away and that it should be kept a secret from the world so that other people will want to be around them.
4. Weird Eating Habits
The reason that eating is such a focal point for sufferers is that it’s something that they can control. They can choose to ignore their hunger pains, or they can shovel as much food into their faces as they want. It’s also proven that eating foods that aren’t particularly good for you, such as sugary or fried foods, releases more serotonin into the body. Serotonin is responsible for alleviating moods and reducing anxiety, and that can become like a craving for those with depression.
5. Weird Sleeping Habits
Sleeping too much or not enough seems to be the pattern for those suffering from depression. Because the body is out of synch with itself, the brain doesn’t know how to react and either released too much melatonin or not enough.
Sleep is the second important element to good health, both physically and mentally. The problem here is that rest is also another element that the sufferer has control over. Being able to control at least one thing in their life gives that person some amount of power when they feel like everything else is spiraling out of control.
6. Over-Thinking Things
Because people with depression are not in control of their thoughts, they can quickly run away with them. They’re always swimming in a pool of thoughts and emotions, analyzing everything to see what the best outcome will be.
Their minds can be a little messy and crowded, at the expense of everything else going on in their lives. This over-thinking can lead to some necessities being forgotten or omitted from their daily schedule altogether. Take care not to point it out to them as this may cause them to regress and hide their problems even further.
7. Self-Reliant
Those with depression tend to look to themselves to solve their problems. They don’t seek outside help because they want to feel that sense of control over the situation before them.
Many people consider this to be a good trait, as they’re self-reliant, but it can actually be quite detrimental to their psyches. Relying on only themselves 100% of the time can get tiring, and even if there’s some sense of fulfillment for completing a job on their own, that feeling never lasts long for a depressed person.
8. Always Ready for the Worst
Depressed people are always prepared for the worst to happen. Instead of being hopeful and looking for the silver linings, they always and only expect the worst to happen.
They may tell you that they’re just realistic about expectations, but when those expectations are always in the negative, and then you should realize that something is wrong. It might be time to sit down and have a talk with them, but don’t force things if they don’t seem interested. Depressed people can get somewhat defensive about their emotions.
9. Habitual Remedies
People with depression like to keep a routine; that way, they can continue exerting some control over their lives. Even if someone is taking medication and seeking therapy for their depression, there are habits they’re going to practice in their everyday lives to keep moving in the right direction.
It could simple habits such as going for walks at the same time every day, listening to music, or doing exercise. It’s these simple exercises that keep them out of falling into those sinking feelings again that serve as the lifesavers to stop them from focusing on intrusive thoughts.
10. Cover-Up Stories
Depressed people most time don’t want other people to know the truth, so they become experts at covering things up. They make up stories about their behavior, their change in appearance, or why there are scars on their arms.
This need to distract from the truth is a dangerous thing; it makes it hard for other people to determine that they need help, especially if they don’t know what to look for. Moreover, by the person playing it off as nothing, they’re also not accepting that they’re at a low point and should be looking for help.
11. Heightened Perception of Life and Death
Not very many people understand that depression doesn’t always lead to suicide. After all, that’s all we hear about in the news. However, what depression does is skew one’s perception of life and death.
The concept of one’s mortality usually comes to mind during moments of crisis or desperation. Also, with the fluctuation of moods, going in and out of these mindsets frequently can make these thoughts more prevalent.
12. Intense Understanding of Substances
Someone who is control of their depression is going to be more adamantly aware of what’s going into their bodies. They may express a level of knowledge about substances that seems higher than the average person should have.
They’re aware that sugars and caffeine are uppers for their moods, and what medications will adversely affect them. They know what medications they shouldn’t be mixing with foods too to cause an adverse reaction. It’s a responsibility they realize they can’t share with anyone else as they have to take care of their own minds.
13. Searching for a Purpose
Many of those who are depressed are searching for a purpose or meaning in their lives. They need to find something that they consider worthwhile doing so that they can feel like they’re moving in the right direction.
This notion is because feelings of inadequacy and fear are active in the depressed mind, which they yearn for validation of some kind in the activities they’re doing. It’s their way of trying to make themselves happy that doesn’t involve seeking help from others.
14. Seek Love and Acceptance
As with finding a purpose, they’re also trying to find love and acceptance from those around them. They may strive to be a people-pleaser so that other people will like them.
Also, it’s that seeking love and acceptance that they hide their inner demons. They want to be attractive to other people so that they can be seen as a friend. Not everyone is equipped to deal with the ugly head of depression, so it’s kept hidden to spare others from that discomfort. The goal is not to be dishonest, but to appear as the best version of them possible.
15. Subtle Cries for Help
When you think of a depressed person, you think of someone that wants to be alone all the time and doesn’t want to talk to anyone. That’s partly true. Depressed people may generally pull away from other people most of the time, but there are some instances where their depression becomes too much to deal with on their own.
Look for those moments when they choose to open up and talk about their conditions. These are the most crucial times where they’re crying for help. Try to meet them halfway but don’t react with anger. That will make them withdraw and not want to talk about it ever again.
16. Lifestyle Changes
If you know someone who doesn’t exercise regularly and then see them suddenly start going for a job every day, they could be dealing with depression on their own. Engaging in some activity makes it easy for them to focus on something else other than their moods.
Engaging in these activities helps to release endorphins, which can make the body feel better overall. This rush can cause them to seek it out more and more so that they start engaging in these activities more often.
17. Avoidance
People with depression can sometimes choose to avoid everything. People, places, and even essential appointments that they have, they don’t want anything to do with anything. This can significantly affect their lives, as they also skip paying their bills or going to classes. Depression is a horrible, cruel monster that makes it easy for people’s lives to be ruined.
Avoiding regular activities and seeing people makes it easier for them, as they don’t have to pretend that everything is okay. Especially on those exhausting days when everything feels like too much, they may choose just to sleep all day instead.
18. Compulsive Behaviors
Many people with depression can start taking up compulsive, obsessive behaviors. Again, this is the need to exert some control over their lives that they felt have spiraled out of control. Some people may take multiple showers a day just because it’s the only way they know how to relax and feel good, while some people may engage in harmful behavior, such as trichotillomania (pulling out hair).
These behaviors may be difficult to notice at first if you don’t spend much time around that person. However, if you’re aware of what their normal day-to-day lives are like, then you’d have a better understanding of what seems out of the ordinary.
19. Steering Conversations Away From Themselves
When people are depressed, the last thing they want to do is talk about them. They don’t want to admit to others that their lives are less than perfect and that they’ll be judged for their behavior or not reaching out for help.
That’s why they tend to conversations more towards other people than themselves. They prefer actively listening to people’s lives than contemplating their own and how screwed up everything seems to be. Alternatively, worse, having to put those feelings into words and hoping they’re not judged for them.
20. Avoiding Eye Contact
People who live with depression tend to have very low senses of self-esteem. They see themselves as below other people and not worthy of their attention.
That’s why most people find it hard to make eye contact with other people during a conversation. They tend to look down or at anything else that’s in the room that they can focus their gaze. It makes it easier for them to keep separated from the person they’re speaking with.
21. Reacting Unexpectedly Negatively
Dealing with depression can be a tiring experience. There are explanations for every aspect of your life, not wanting people to discover the truth, and trying to figure out how to fix the problem on their own.
Handling all of this by themselves builds up over time that when the smallest thing happens, that breaks the camel’s back, it’s interpreted as overreacting. This sudden outburst is a sign that something is definitely wrong and that they’re overwhelmed with something. It’s more than just being in a bad mood.
22. Disappearing for Long Periods
Someone dealing with depression and trying to deal with it on their own may disappear for long periods. They may choose to disappear for a while, either by staying at home or going on a sudden drive somewhere without telling anyone.
Coming to terms with depression on their own can become overwhelming that they need to take a break from everything else to stop themselves from falling apart. If you notice this pattern in someone you know, then it may be time to intervene to see if everything is okay.
